Entry 035
This post is for my husband.
He is the greatest father to our angels.
He is my strength when I have none.
He deserves to be seen as a real dad.
He holds his breath with me while we wait.
He does everything he can to make sure I’m okay, even when he’s hurting.
He has seen me in a hospital bed far too many times.
He holds me as I cry.
He gave me daily shots when I couldn’t get myself to do it.
He drives me to every appointment.
He knows far more about what all needs to go right to sustain pregnancy than the average man.
He never holds it against me that my body keeps failing us.
He is willing to do whatever is needed so we can have a baby on earth.
He listens to me rant on and on about how unfair this is.
He sat with me while I was in agonizing physical pain knowing there’s nothing he could do.
He works long hours to ensure we can pay my never-ending medical bills.
He makes sure we have good times, even though we’re heartbroken.
He encourages me to research, challenge the doctors and request my own tests—even when I sound crazy.
He watches his friends become dads of living children while praying to hold his own someday.
He is my constant in what seems like endless uncertainty.
He reminds me his love for me isn’t dependent on us having a living child.
He is the only person who understands.
He makes sure I know my worth when I feel I have none.
He is the reason I keep going.
Emily Lindquist