Entry 003

October 15th is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. If you happen to be reading this the day it’s posted, you know that’s today.

Most people don’t know such a day exists. I certainly didn’t until my life became seemingly consumed by my miscarriages. A few losses ago, I looked for days like today as another way to remember and acknowledge my babies.

But today really isn’t just for parents of children who left us way too soon. Sure, a day dedicated to spreading awareness of what we’ve gone through is nice. But we don’t need the reminder. We know the horror we experienced. We know our babies died. We know there is nothing we can do to change that.

Today is for the family members trying to learn how to comfort their loved one whose pregnancy ended before they got to share the news of baby’s existence.

Today is for the friend wondering why the loss mama didn’t show up for her baby shower even though she said she would and for the guys wondering why he’s taking it so hard even though he never felt the baby move. 

Today is for the pregnancy apps still notifying the mother of baby’s development despite her reporting the loss and for the company still emailing her coupons for customized onesies even though she unsubscribed.

Today is for the co-workers wondering how she can be ‘fine’ even though she just miscarried while she cries in the bathroom and changes another blood-soaked pad because she doesn’t have any more PTO. 

Today is for the people who mean well but still can’t manage to understand that no, God didn’t need that baby more than its parents did on earth.

Today isn’t just for people with dead children. In some way, shape or form, it’s for everyone. National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day is for all of us.

Emily Lindquist